sammi hates veggies

Sammi is sixteen. Of me and my three sisters, she is the thirdborn and the coolest by far.

She’s that rare kind of chick who gets along with everyone. Male, female, young, old – everyone likes Sam.

Because she’s cool. She’s pretty. She knows music most teenagers have never heard of. She can rap and do the chicken leg dance at the same time. She honks a mean sax. Her serves are killer. She boxes out like nobody’s biznass. She wears red-and-white striped knee-high socks to church.

She doesn’t eat vegetables. Ever.

Last night in one of our typical fits of weirdness my family was sitting around discussing the foods we don’t like. If you care, here’s a rundown:

Dad hates: oranges, root beer, and licorice. That’s all he could come up with.

Mom hates: liver, mushy vegetables, and chicken gizzards. Like anyone likes that stuff.

Ginny hates: steak, all seafood except crab and lobster, and squishy mushrooms.

Jamie was in the shower and missed this conversation, but I’m pretty sure she has issues with gravy, ketchup, and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

I hate: sausage, liver, onions, potato soup, and textured food additives. Yeah. That’s weird. It’s sort of like this – I like nuts, and raisins, and stuff like that, but not IN things. I don’t want nuts in my brownies. I don’t want raisins baked into my food. I prefer food that is consistently textured.

Then we get to Sam. Sammi hates – well, most things. So with her we had to make a list of things that she does eat. Here it is:

  • chicken nuggets
  • toast
  • cereal
  • popcorn
  • cheese pizza
  • spaghetti with meat sauce, no vegetables
  • mashed potatoes
  • turkey, chicken
  • bananas
  • apples
  • saltine crackers
  • sausage gravy & biscuits
  • ramen noodles

Seriously. That’s like all she eats. All other foods she proclaims “gross,” pronounced like “GROZE,” with a sideways sneer that makes her look about eight years old.

She hates vegetables. And with her, it’s not a control issue or an eating disorder. She really does hate them. She has hated them from practically the moment she was born. My parents finally gave up on the hours-long torturous ordeals of forcing Sam to eat one serving of vegetable X before leaving the table. She’d cry. She’d gag. She’d barf. Just like many of us did as kids – the problem is, Sam never grew out of that.

So lately we’ve been noticing more than ever how pale and anemic she is, and my parents are starting to get worried.

What are we gonna do with the kid?

I told her I was going to write an entry about her today, but seriously – we’re kind of at a loss, if she hates vegetables, as to how we’re going to get the nutrients she needs into her system. She can take a daily vitamin but I’m not sure that will be enough. Any ideas?

9 Replies to “sammi hates veggies”

  1. “Pale and anemic” does require some attention.

    Does she like fruit juices or would she go for something like a smoothie? The acquisition of a veggie juicer could mean that some veggie juices could be added to, say, apple juice. This worked for my nephew, though it was all upfront.

  2. My little sister has the same problem, she only likes certain foods, she doesn't eat meat but enjoys ketchup and bread or ketchup and chips, weird. She's looking better now but she was very skinny for a while there and my family got quite worried.

  3. Alright she seems really cool, but is she human? I mean she doesn't like cheese pizza. Who does that? She sounds like a firecracker though.

  4. I know a fella – no veggies – none. He's skinny and weak at about 29 and I'm convinced that all his weight comes only from the growing collection in his bowels. Dude, just talk about her bowels all day until she drinks a superfood (odwalla)
    …but she's not gonna like that – listen, check out and locate (and purchase) the following supplements:
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  5. You forgot that I also dislike: Pork, peas, spanish rice, potato soup, lima beans, liver, brussel sprouts, turnips, spinach, collards, sweet pickles, tofu, regular oatmeal, CABBAGE!!! and other stuff too.

  6. force feeding is still an option. i used to hate veggies and now its all i eat…that could be because its all i can afford to eat and stay healthy on…yah go with the forced feeding or hypmatise her into loveing vegetables. maybe thats what my parents did.?

  7. I never ate veggies when I was a teenager. Then I went to Berkeley, fell in love with a granola girl vegetarian, and became the sultan of sprouts. Just go find her a nice vegan boyfriend… nothing, absolutely nothing, changes diets like falling in love.

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