Dear Jake Plummer,
We’re making progress. I’ve complained and complained to you about the whole mountain man look, and I’m happy to see that you’ve been paying at least a little bit of attention. But seriously, for the love of all that is good in this world, LOSE THAT STUPID MUSTACHE. It makes you look creepy, and I hope I speak for most people when I tell you that White Trash Chic is not an acceptable replacement for Mountain Man Chic. You used to be so pretty, Jake. C’mon. Shave it.
PS – Great game!