The Hair Is The Scapegoat

April 7, 2006


I was sorting files earlier and ran across this photo of me from my 2003 staff ID card. Check out how that haircut makes my head look like a Brussels sprout. I was thinking about chopping all of my hair off again, but I really don’t want to look any more like a vegetable than I have to.

In this picture my hair is shorter than it’s ever been in my life. I actually think I was born with longer hair than I have in this picture. It was nice in that it took way less time to dry and style than it does now, but on the other hand – Brussels sprout.

In high school I had really, really long hair – down to my waist at one point – and it was a bit of a trademark. After a very ill-advised hair dye incident, I cut it to my shoulders in college, like you do, and when I went home that summer no one recognized me.


Here’s one from Vegas taken at the beginning of last month. I stopped dying it for good sometime before that roundheaded picture up there, and it’s grown in progressively darker over the last couple of years until it’s the shade it is now. It’s also longer right now than it’s been since the early part of college, I think. Also, I didn’t look like a crackwhore in college – at least, I don’t think I did. Maybe I did. I don’t know.

I know I’ve mentioned here before that I want to drastically change my hair whenever I’m in turmoil about something, and although I’m not in turmoil, exactly, I’m feeling antsy and have been really tempted to cut/dye/otherwise completely change the look of my hair. But then I’m like, man, I took all this time growing it out, I have a pretty good cut, I shouldn’t mess with it, blah…and I get annoyed that it takes so long to style, but on the other hand, it’s super healthy, and I no longer have to wet it every day to style it like I did when it was short. I almost never wash it daily – usually every other day, sometimes every third day. Jonathan says I have some of the healthiest hair he’s ever seen.

I don’t know. I’m pretty sure I won’t end up chopping it as short as it is in that earlier picture, and I’m damn sure it won’t grow down to my waist again. I just can’t decide if I ought to change it right now, get J to throw in some highlights, leave it the heck alone, or what.

I think I’m bored with my life.

Filed under: everyday stories

18 Comments Leave a Comment

  • 1. andrew  |  April 7, 2006 at 3:40 pm

    leave it alone. best haircut ever.

  • 2. Lauren  |  April 7, 2006 at 3:45 pm

    I like the color it is in the crack whore picture. I’m also having a hair funk thing going on. Mine’s longer now than it’s been since I was in elementary school. I want to get a fun summer cut and maybe do some coloring again, but I don’t want to do that and then get back into that cycle of upkeep where I’m spending like $120 every other month at the salon. meh.

  • 3. Hugo  |  April 7, 2006 at 5:48 pm

    Having only two pictures to go on, I like it long — but you’ve got the face to carry short hair, which not everyone does.

  • 4. ImFromCollege  |  April 7, 2006 at 5:57 pm

    You could get it cut shorter but a different style than the first picture. If you have thick hair, getting it cut short with a razor won’t make it look so round. But I like your hair in the second picture.

  • 5. cK  |  April 7, 2006 at 6:37 pm

    Ah, the body’s art. Change it as you wish and walk with confidence. So: Hair dyeing still recalls to me the scene in the Outsiders when they cut their hair with very dull scissors and dye C. Thomas Howell’s hair blonde. Abrupt hair-dyeing does seem to have a rogue element, does it not?

    I don’t recall vibrant hair color, save for on a few punks, before Gem (who was truly truly truly outrageous). She was a prophet.
    -cK

  • 6. Emily  |  April 7, 2006 at 6:53 pm

    I’m the same way. Usually I make an appointment as soon as I feel the slightest hint of the hair change itch because by the time I can get into the salon, the itch is in dire need of a scratch. But I, for one, think your hair looks great now! I especially love your natural color!

  • 7. Sandy  |  April 7, 2006 at 9:42 pm

    Don’t do it, man. I would KILL for that head of hair right there. That Brussels sprout hair? I LOOKED EXACTLY LIKE THAT AT WORK TODAY, after an ill-advised run-in with hot rollers.

  • 8. jim  |  April 8, 2006 at 2:06 am

    i dont think the short hair is as bad as you say.

    but! the fact that i can see your eyes THRU THE SUNGLASSES?

    THAT, my friend, is SCARY SHIT.

  • 9. jessie  |  April 8, 2006 at 8:34 am

    Your hair is so pretty in the “crack whore” picture. Maybe just some highlights or lowlights?

  • 10. Amy Bo Bamy  |  April 8, 2006 at 10:01 am

    I love the hair in the second picture. :)

    [and, now I have the Gem theme song stuck in my head, lol]

  • 11. Ginny  |  April 8, 2006 at 12:19 pm

    brussel(S) sprout? is this another sherbert revelation…. it’s not BRUSSEL Sprout? OMG!

  • 12. will  |  April 10, 2006 at 7:29 am

    If you are looking for personal preferences, your hair does seem more appealing longer, as long as you take care of it. You are an attractive woman with a penchant for honesty, principles, and compassion, so the length doesn’t really matter that much.

    Bored with your life? Consider brightening someone else’s through volunteer work, and watch your boredom evaporate.

  • 13. mike  |  April 10, 2006 at 12:42 pm

    If you are unsure, wear a hat.

  • 14. jen  |  April 10, 2006 at 1:09 pm

    I like it the way it is now. Maybe just go in for a clear coat of Shades, which will make it all shiny …

    … or, and I know this will probably sound weird, go tan. Seriously, changing the shade of your face totally changes the look of your hair.

    I swear I’m not high right now.

  • 15. Ginny  |  April 10, 2006 at 6:35 pm

    dude. it is monday. Where the hell is my loriestory?

  • 16. jessie  |  April 10, 2006 at 7:00 pm

    some old coworkers happened upon my blog and I needed to switch addresses so they couldn’t read all about our upcoming move to Denver. Anyways, here’s the new blog address…

    http://patrickthehedgehog.wordpress.com/

  • 17. Heather B.  |  April 11, 2006 at 9:06 am

    I think I’m bored too, I’m seriously contemplating highlights right now and/or shaving my head. Keep it long, looks good.

  • 18. Ginny  |  April 12, 2006 at 10:30 am

    did you fall off the face of the earth again? I think ima call you…

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