Zip It, Katie

I watch the Today show every morning while I’m procrastinating on getting ready for work, and lately I’ve been distinctly relieved on the days when Katie Couric isn’t there. I’ve been finding her increasingly annoying to the point that I can barely stand to listen to her.

I wasn’t always this way. I used to love Katie Couric. I used to want to BE Katie Couric. But then, I also used to like babydoll dresses with platform Mary Janes and/or baggy flannel shirts over bodysuits and baggy jeans and boots.

Here’s why I don’t like Katie Couric anymore:

• Ever-weirder hair and fashion choices (although I can’t really talk; see above). I guess it’s no reason to dislike someone, but when you add this up with everything else, it matters.
• Obnoxious tendency to play dumb with her coworkers and to play smart with her interview subjects. Neither tactic works.
• Poor interview techniques that are driving me BATSHIT effin’ CRAZY.

Wait. Bullet list over, because this is serious. This is the thing that’s really getting to me.

It doesn’t matter if Katie’s interviewing someone about a pair of shoes, or about heart disease, or about criminal corporate lobbyists (thanks, Mike) – I can pretty much bet my morning Diet Coke that she’s going to do any or all of the following:

a) Interrupt/talk over the guest;
b) Ask questions and then feed the guest the answers she wants;
c) Interject her personal opinion, sometimes supporting it with bullshit “facts,” sometimes to the point that the interview heads into yet ANOTHER All About Katie kind of direction;
d) After completely hijacking the interview, interrupt the guest again for running over the allotted segment length, and get all impatient when the guest tries to finish his/her damn sentence.

Maybe Katie should just have a show where she’s the star and everyone pays attention to her and we get to sit for hours on end and listen to whatever Katie thinks is important. Oh, wait. We already have that. It’s called THE TODAY SHOW.

And also, did anyone see that episode a few weeks ago when they brought Richard Simmons on the show and Katie took him down to the control room and tried to make all the staff members in the control room drop what they were doing and work out on the spot, and THEN proceeded to begin singling out staff members who needed to get into better shape? On the air?

I wish I could make this shit up. You know you’re in trouble when Richard freakin’ Simmons has to steer your segment back to a place where it’s in good taste.

I used to think that Katie was very smart and with-it and really respected how hard she’d worked to make it so far in her field. I also used to think that she had some kind of extra-special intelligence because she went to UVA, but as it turns out, I know plenty of dumbasses with degrees from The University (as they call themselves). I don’t know if she’s changed, or if I’ve just learned more, but I don’t think she’s the kind of “journalist” who’s a good example for anyone these days.

I might have to find something else to listen to while I’m getting ready for work in the morning. As it is, I realized recently that I’m watching approximately four hours of television news coverage a day – or, at least I have it on – and since I also read news on the internet, maybe I need to find something more useful to do with my time. Like knit a damn sweater or something.