Alternate post title: Picking on My Mom, Volume 472.
Batman Begins is scheduled to open in the US on Friday, June 17th. We are excited about this because we’re totally and completely down with Batman, and from all accounts, this film is looking pretty good. Also, Christian Bale.
June 17th is also significant because it’s my mother’s birthday. So the other day, Ginny’s all, “Hey Mom, let’s go see Batman Begins for your birthday.”
“No! I hate Batman!” was the response.
After we got all indignant and how can you hate BATMAN?, I’m like, “What, you don’t want a Batman birthday party? With Batman cups and Batman plates and a Batman tablecloth?”
“No!” Mom said. “I hate Batman! You should have a Wizard of Oz birthday party!” (The Wizard of Oz is her favorite movie and collector obsession.)
When we pointed out that a Wizard of Oz birthday party would be totally stupid, since Batman Begins is what’s opening on her birthday, she said that we had to have the kind of party she wanted because it’s HER BIRTHDAY. But I pointed out that when other people are having a surprise party for you, you don’t get any say in what the party theme is going to be, so maybe we’d just do that.
And then I was like, “Oooh, Batman cake.”
And my mom’s getting progressively more flustered and hilarious, as is her way, all, “I don’t want a Batman birthday party and I won’t come to a Batman birthday party and I HATE BATMAN!”
(By the way, getting your mom to say, out loud, “I don’t want a Batman birthday party” might just be the funniest thing ever. Try it.)
So we’re totally planning a Batman birthday party for my mom, complete with Batman plates and Batman cups and Batman napkins and a Batman tablecloth. And a Batman cake. And a Batman centerpiece. Ooh, and did you know you can get Batman heads for everyone in the party to wear? And foam Batarangs?
We are so doing this. And we remind my mom about it approximately twice a day, if for no other reason than to see her get all mad and yell that she doesn’t want a Batman birthday party.
Which is too bad, because that’s exactly what she’s going to get.