Smorgasbord

If you are a vendor and you want our business, or we already work with you and you just want us to love you all to bits, then you should definitely bring expensive treats by our office at this time of year. We don’t get to buy that stuff for ourselves because we’re in nonprofit, but we have no ethical issues preventing us from accepting gifts of this nature.

Since my program relocated to a new (and out-of-the-way) building last summer, we’ve kind of gotten the shaft on the holiday treats. The people we do business with tend to take their gifts to our main offices, and they rarely if ever make it down to our house.

This is good for my figure and bad for my morale.

Luckily, this year we managed to score a bag of Moose Munch from Harry and David that I’m certain was a part of a larger H&D gift basket. I’m happy we got the Moose Munch, because that’s some good stuff, but I’m a little pissed because I am a horrible, impolite human being, and I suspect the Moose Munch came in the Holiday Hamper, and as you will see by visiting that link, the Holiday Hamper includes the legendary Harry & David Royal Riviera pears. And nuts. And truffles. And other amazing and exciting gourmet treats.

And you know what I haven’t seen or heard about? That’s right. No one breathed a word to us about the potential existence of those pears at the office down the street. I might have walked barefoot in the snow down there to steal a pear, if we actually had snow and if I wasn’t squicked out about walking barefoot on public sidewalks.

Also, I think the Moose Munch gave me a tummyache the other day.

Anyway. Today, our favorite oh-so-hot-and-friendly sales rep ever in the world came by with a big-ass box of awesome treat stuff for us. I’m sitting here eating chocolate-covered raisins from said big-ass box right this minute and I’m pretty happy about that.

I am sure, though, that when our favorite oh-so-hot-and-friendly sales rep ever in the world was in my office, that I may have been a little moony. And I’m a bit embarrassed about that.

But seriously, he’s hot and nice and we love him and want to marry him. So I think it’s okay if I was a little moony and eyelash-batty while he was here. Maybe.

Yes. We can be plied with food.

Comments 8

  • Moose Munch.
    uh.
    that's pretty funny.

  • That's not so bad. Nobody breathed a word about our Christmas bonuses this year. Because they have ceased to exist.

  • i could bitch about how we don't get christmas bonuses in nonprofit either, except…we kind of did, this year.

    oh, and there's the whole “free 7 days of vacation at christmastime” thing. i shouldn't complain.

  • Maybe mike got enrolled in the Jelly-of-the-month club… but the letter stating so just got lost in the mail. :)

  • We get bonuses here but no possibility of a raise.
    The bonus certainly isn't anything to write home about.

  • Oh, the glories of chocolate covered raisins. Divine.

  • “But seriously, he's hot and nice and we love him and want to marry him. So I think it's okay if I was a little moony and eyelash-batty while he was here. Maybe.”

    We guys like a little bit of interest shown, but if it becomes obvious then we feel too confident, and there is no kick in of the 'chase' instinct.

  • 'Cause you may not have caught on yet that men are dogs.
    …always room for improvement, that's all.
    And the delivery boy is going to want the very best from you.

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